“Injury” Waiver Releases

After making short work of Liverpool 3-0 yesterday, Manchester United duo Cristiano Ronaldo and Nani both apparently took knocks in the match and are going to be opting out of the trip to Dusseldorf later this week. The two midfielders managed to tally in their club’s important victory this past weekend, as Nani miraculously shook off his apparently somewhat serious injury to take flight and do his feature post-goal circus flip celebration. Cristiano didn’t disappoint either, as he also stuck to his trademark soap opera-esque pouty face, edge of crying, look of utter shock and surprise at the fact that he continues to score at an absurd rate this season. Crissy can stop the look of amazement at this point, as I now have the same face on whenever he scores. Unfortunately, that’s simply because I can’t believe how overly dramatic and seemingly self absorbed he is. However, I honestly couldn’t care less if he tongue kisses Simão in his underpants, as long as he’s scoring the same amount for the Selecção this coming summer.

Reports are currently stating that Scolari probably won’t replace them with anyone in particular, since the entire team is essentially midfielders already as it is. Hopefully these two “injuries” will lead to further playing time in the match against Greece for those on the bubble for the eventual final team being taken to Austria and Switzerland in June. If you ask me, these injuries sound like they were called into the Big Phil’s voicemail by Sir Alex putting on his best Portuguese accent and fake sick voice for his two prize midfielders. Or if he’s smart, he had Carlos Queiroz call as Crissy and Anderson as Nani, this way he could make the ruse more believable.

The remaining players not faking an injury and being forced to go to Germany for the friendly this Wednesday had better take the match seriously, as Vice President of the Portuguese Football Corruption *AHEM* Federation, Amândio Carvalho, has said that the match was intentionally scheduled against an opponent such as Greece to ensure that the players were given the proper tune up prior to the championship this summer. And he also has $200 on Portugal to win 2-0.